i feel so weak.
mild not reali meak.
its been like tis for days..
went to work anyways..
work was mainly outdoors today...
come wat may..
it dint help much as it rained most of the time.
played a mean joke on me, not entirely kind.
i'll juz blame the weather for my moodiness..
lost myself with sadness.
im trying hard to get on.
when i realise it..
its almost dawn.
~tas

Of all the tinks I've believed in

I juz want to get it over with

Tears form behind my eyes

But I do not cry

Countin the days tht pass me by

I've been searchin deep down in my soul

Words tht I'm hearin are startin to get old

Goodbye to you

Goodbye to everytink tht I knew

You were the one I loved

The one tink tht I tried to hold on to

I still get lost in your eyes

And it seems that I can't live a day without you

Closin my eyes and you chase my thots away

To a place where I am blinded by the light

But it's not right

And it hurts to want everytink and notink at the same time

I want

But I'm not givin' in this time

And when the stars fall

I will lie awake

* You're my shootin star *

~tas

But juz when u tink u have sort out your thots...
convinced tis time its really over ...
finally allowing urself to let go ...
trying soo hard to move on ...
At tis moment ,
You hear tht familiar voice just one more time
UNCONTROLLABLY...
.. your heart juz falls all over again ..
rite down into the pits ..
rite back to square one..
~tas

work - tiring as usual..
olio dome - ate with xiu pau ps nice!
praba - came over to meet me at wheelock
black - the shooters hurt my throat bad
zouk - harry was interviewed by new york times!
mambo nite - was better than i imagined
supper - at rivervalley rd
talk - the best part of the nite.
home - cabbed back in a comfortable mercz

im falling sick
~tas

i am sooo silly...
i felt soo bad spoiling evryone's fun ...
if onli i dint open my mouth to mention his name..
i wished i'd juz shut up..
then perhaps today cld have been better.
Mambo nite wasnt really as bad as i thought it was.
will update in greater detail again soon..
im in no mood for anytink now.
i need to get him off my mind.
~tas

TODAy WAS AMAZING!!!
TOTALLY AWESOME!!
reali...i havnt felt tis good in a long long time....
meeting Genevieve and Hilda today certainly made my day!!!!
my frenz mean a world to me...
being with Hilda n Gen today was like a dream come true...
MY PRIMARY FOUR BEST FRIENDS!!!!
never in my wildest dreams wld i imagine myself being such good frenz again..
we drifted apart for a whole 6 long years...
never talked much.. never had dinner together.. dint even met up at all those years.....
and we finally did!!
now tht we finished jc..
is it juz amazing or amazing???
im so afraid its juz a dream n i'll wake up frm it n realise its juz a part of my imagination...
seriously...if it was a dream... i wish i'd never wake up frm it...
if it were a dream i'd never want tonite to end...
if it were a dream i'd never wanna wake up frm it...
cuz they are juz frenz i wanna keep for the rest of my life....
im so glad i found my best friends back...
i dun wanna lose u guys ever again! :)
haha.. i tink i sound silly alrdy..
like i alrdy am..
haha... welll...
ate at baker inn today.. Gen's treat! :)
felt quite bad she foot the bill...
its gonna be my turn next! :)
also.. we took alot of fotos today..
took fotos at the eating place.. the toilet too!!
super gross fotos.. les fotos.. nonsense fotos n all....
it was sooooooO fun!!
will post them up soon...
once i get down to uploading them on my com!! haha... :)
well.. gotta go slp soon.. work's as usual tmr...
gonna party tmr! :) hapi hapi!!
~tas

had wonderful company today!!
reali reali glad!! :)
Debra thx for the long talk...
always love talking to you!! :)
im so waiting for episode TWO tmr!!
haha... unravelling all the "gossips"..
haha.. :)
~tas

today is a horrendous day.....
i onli closed TWO deals!!!
its like OHHH MANN...
so pathetic.....
super horrid..........
~tas

GOOooooD FRIDAAaaaYYY!!
haha.. cool day..
woke up early for good friday service at church..
tis yr's good friday play isnt like previous years ones..
learnt abt the carpenter story...
finally understd alot of things..
well God planned for us a life in which he wants us to take..
n even the life of His precious Son..
sths i wish i can stop n not tink..
i tink too much..

Anw today's Stranger event was sucha blast!!!
i sold every single ticket i had with me...
thts a total of 394 tickets!!!
and there were definitely more than 400 hundred ppl in tht hall..
it was amazing!!!
i doubled-tripled up as the ticketing girl selling tickets at the registration table..
the food-server serving food stationed at the catering table...
and the last-minute make-up artist for the actresses and actors..
haha.. xiu wld be too shocked to see tis..
haha...but YES.. i did the makeup for the performers.. haha...
it was soooOOO fun!! haha..
seriously.. it turned out quite pretty..
haha..used to do it for my choir girls before their performances too..
doing it today was super fun... esp xiang's...
she was soo cute n pretty!!
and her eye lashes are sooooO long!!
haha...and i MUST mention caron!!
the song she sang today was simply fantastic!!
it was reali reali good...
i was moved to tears..
she has the makings of a star!!!
im so glad today's a success!!
haha..

Oh.. and one very very very very exciting date is coming up...
GENEVIEVE, HILDA and me..
we're finally gonna meet up aft like 6 years..
they were my Primary skool BEST FRENZ!!!
we dint meet at all these past years aft graduating frm CHIJ-OLGC...
and now its a dream come true..
having HILDA back as a friend is wonderful...
more than all i can ever ask for...
and now GENEVIEVE TOoo!!!!
its really beyond me!!
its simply too good to be true!!!
im so glad tis is all happening!!
i sure look forward to it..
and tht evry thing will work out for the better!!!
wish i can have them back as close frenz like we used to...
its like a dream come true!!
im happy... sooo happy now!!
haha... its like.. WOW!!
haha.... im haha-ing so much...im going crazy...
its so OMG... like wow...

and Pinky.. hope to see ya sunday!!..
pls pls pls pls come rite in... not stand far far away where i cant see ya..
i reali need a good laugh!!
so pls come in i'll ask jason to let me off for awhile n we'll chat k...
seeya soon!
~tas

found a more normal foto of us in jason's car...

cramp cramps cramps.....
arh.....
was out on assignments all day...
cabbed my whole day away goin ard spore...
wenta tampines, ikea, clementi, toa payoh, queens, town, stevens rd....
im tired...
tmr's good friday...
i hope it'll be good....
the whole day..
stranger event...
thank you JESUS forall u've done...
at the mean time..
anyone still wanna come for the stranger concert???
come find me k.. the invitation is open to ALL! :)
God is good, All the time!
All the time, God is good!
~tas

it's you when I look in the mirror

it's you that makes it hard to let go

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

Sometimes you can't make it

Best you can do is to fake it

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

And it's you when I look in the mirror

And it's you I see when close my eyes

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

~tas

rain was the last word i blogged juz before i went offline to go to bed..
today.. aft work.. it was raining so heavily..
i dint tink it'll stop anytime soon..
guess wat??
i PLAYED IN THE RAIN!!!
it was sooo FUN i tell you!!...
seriously... i felt so happy....
it was sucha wonderful feeling..
so wild n free...
i was drenched from top to toe...
yet i left soo happy..
all the sadness, all the blues.. all the unhappiness, all the stress...
they all left me the moment i went out into the rain...
i felt so carefree.. so unconstrained...
for once in a very long time i was flying high...
theres this joyful feeling in me.
blithely enjoying the moment..
when the raindrops fell...
if only there was someone there with me to enjoy the moment..
then there would be someone to share the joy with me..
:) so ... the nex time it rains... any one game for it ???
let me noe k... :)

ended work very early today...
supposed to be my day off though...
but anw.. wenta cut my hair today...
dint cut short... juz thin it to shape cuz i thot its too messy to maintain..
met calvin when he was working... chat awhile..
left aft tht...
tink i need slp...

btw.. Thank you Wendy for e birthday card you sent over.. will try to send ur parcel over to u soon.. :) take kare dear..
~tas

RAIN

im am tired to the MAX!!
work till quite late...
was supposed to be off early today..
but anw...
wenta have dinner ...
with xiu pauline n isabella today..
at Sushi Tei Again...
eat till sooo full!!...
wenta indochine for awhile...
it was salsa nite...
quite cool..
but too bad i cant dance salsa..
dint wanna make a fool of myself...
i thot pauline n xiu likes it too....
they were so engrossed with it...
so i tink onli bella is up to it..
i like the ambience there too...
juz felt tht its a lil more crowded tonight than usual...
prefer it quieter...
drank a lil..
aust wine tht bella ordered...
dint have much cash with me..
so dint wanna drink..
dint wana tax the rest..
but actualli main reason i dint wanna drink is cuz i hadta work tmr...
but i did anyway..
gave them all i had with me..
emptied my wallet...
so pathetic.. :p
haha.. but realised i hadta go draw money anw...
not literally draw..
but withdrew cash..
cuz hadta buy supper for the folks at home..
haha...felt so silly la..
anw.. had cramps all day..
the kinda pain tht comes off n on...
throbbing pain sths.. gets quite bad sths...
got home feeling tired....
cramps again...
so tink i gonna slp soon..
realise tht im not off tmr..
but full day work...
lotsa work to do in office...
sigh... another day of travelling again...
i took like five six times cab a day...
im a total taxi freak now..
luckily for work ... can claim transport..
but i hope it doesnt become a habit for myself..
or im gonna be so broke...
must learn to save not spend...
muz save to go travelling... go ard the world..
haha... i muz be dreaming..
but maybe one day it'll come true..
haha.... dream a lil dream...
~tas

Thank you all !!!!!!!!

my present... :) so cute lol...

our dear jingmin dancing.. haha.. cool dude!

the mime pepz.. soo bright.. !!!

xiang... during the play.. haha.. so adorable!!

backstage... haha.. they all look so.. occupied.. haha

the rehearsal.. for stranger....

xiu me n pauline.. us.. in Jason's BMW sports car...the wind in our hair.. literally.. it was soo fun! seriously.. :) haha..

another artistic photo.. blurblur one..

xiu.. duno why so happy oso... haha...

artistic huh?? haha...

photo taken on the day we collect our results... evryone looks so tensed...

claudia n me.. at planetshakers..!! :)

me n jo.. my dearest godsis... :)

XIU... act shy.. act sweet? very act man... haha..

lala n nana on the cab...

angela n me... she looks so slpy.. haha!

my pretty flower... Hilda gave me... plus the same adidas shoe that both angela and i bought except diff colour...

me... i was reali reali happy at tis moment..reali. reali. feel so blessed.. so xin fu...

they have been a joy to be with...
they celebrated my birthday for me...
took pains to lug the cake evrywhere.....
to church then to the planetshakers concert.. then to pasir ris whitesands Macs....
along with evelyn, esmond n aaron.. !
thx guys!
a pity i dint manage to get e photo of the cake my dearest sec 4 cell girls gave me...
thank you girls anyway.. :)
u noe i love you all..
~tas

a lil closer... nicer shot... :)

US all at Kenny Rogers at Suntec...

qi-er and me and vic toe!! the rest sadly cant join in cuz got not enuff space...

swensens cake frm my darling dear frenz.. frm xiu, angelala, vic, nel and ps... :)

my cake... frm my cell.. the unleaven bread... why two candles arh? im not 20 yet leh...

tis is the one with the wrong sied of KEITH.. so retard.. haha... but cute!

our first cell grp photo!! :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WENDY!!
will post the fotos soon..
my host is down now..
cant seem to get it done..
oh well.. too bad for now...
well...
one more thing..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WENDY!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DECHENG!!!
may u have a wonderful fantabulous birthday!!
~tas

woke up sooo early to getta church today....
actually it was more like i cant get to slp at all cuz of last nite....
cant slp so got up really early..
felt tht evrytink was goin against my way ever since the clock striked twelve yest....
my printer failed me when i was trying to print stuff...
had to write out e songs for worship in e end...
n to find out later tht morning tht it worked perfectly fine...
i guess i have myself to blame for being late for cell today...
it was reali sheer bad luck...
u wouldnt believe how coincidently
i was so pissed i broke down in tears....
sson enuff i found myself gushing..
felt so foolish crying there...
wanted to stop but i juz cldnt....
guess it juz wasnt abt e journey there..
juz feel i totally hadta let it out..
n for tis i found a good excuse to let the teardrops stream down my face...
i felt so pathetic... so helpless...
left stranded juz liddat....
i prayed. prayed. and prayed.
felt better somehow...

however things changed the minute i stepped into church.
i saw ting n felt sooo relieved..
duno why...
its like finally someone whom i know i can trust n rely on...
immediately i rattled on n on abt evrytink to her..
i guess it was juz meant to be...
they dint start cell first without me...
the room we were supposed to be in was locked..
cant get in...
walked up n down...
finally.. managed to open e door to room 41!!
Praise the Lord!!
haha...they were so sweet..
they got me a cake... sooooo sweet!!! i was "wowed"...
and happy!!! almost estatic!! haha...
hohon was sooo funni..
seriously he's like the KING of Jokes...
i swear his one funny guy...
though pretty lame at times...
we did worship, some discussion abt the passover lamb and some sharing..
which i onli managed to share but not a part to hear frm e rest as i hadta leave for work alrdy..
we took pictures before i left...
its hilarious la..
will post the photos soon...
its the first time we actualli took a cell foto..
its cool.. haha :)

also wanna thank jingmin, elaine, ben, jaime, len jie, natasha and chia how...
for keeping me in mind...n thx for all ur well wishes...
and also to my adult cell grp..
which includes Dengzhi, Keith, Darren, Ting, Charlene, Samuel, Rachel and Bryan...
thx for evrytink!!
i had an almost wonderfully perfect day (leaving the morning part)...
had quite alot of fun despite the bad start...
things worked out for the better...
work was good today...
get along much better with the ppl dere...
Karen! mendy! jason and kate... thank you too! :)
u make work so much more fun for me now...
though i still miss huiying...
i miss laughing with u...
sold quite a number of phones too today...
even a P910i.. haha.. so cool..
anw i juz gotta thank God for making my day turn out so much better than expected..
juz a lil teeny weeny tinge of regret...
tht e ppl i thot i cared... *sigh*
~tas

There's juz soo much within me right now i seriously dunno where to start....
theres juz soo much tht happened today...
words just fail me.
Its an AWESOME Birthday for me..
HAPPY is just TOOOO mild a word to be used...
so many pleasanties.. (xiu dun comment.. tis word is definitely not found in e dictionary :p)
a wonderful day.. juz because i have many more-than-just-wonderful FRIENDS!

FIrstly, a special tribute to my two super-duper-ultra-amazing frenz..
ppl i noe i can always count on....
ANGELA- my dearest penguin an-qi-er & Ms Gan Siew Kuen aka XIUJUAN!!
just to let u know i reali value our friendship..
you guys have been awesome!!!
Thx for the celebration lunch party thing at kenny rogers n the swensens ice-cream cake..
Thank you Angela, Xiu, Nelvin, Vic and PS...
thx for keeping it low, and not pull a fast one when cutting e cake...
n kept me clean thru-out
you guys are the sweetest...

Also, to my dearest lil girl...
Khoo Kexin!!
thank you for coming all e way down so early...
juz to have breakfast with me..
having prata with you is soo fun..
cuz i always getta cope more food frm ur plate! :)
anw ur on diet rite??
haha... and oso thank you for ur present!! :) im so in love with it..

cell grp...
the sweetest and ever so lovable bunch of girlsl......
i love u guys... all of u...
Ting, Jolene, Charlene, Huey Ying, Claudia, Steffy, Caron, Robyn, Joanne, Tabi, Peizhi and all..
Thx Jo and Hy for always always finding ways to cheer me up..
i reali appreciate it frm e bottom of my heart..
n Jo though u failed to be the first... u succeeded to be e last!! haha...
and to those at Pasir Ris whitesands MacDonalds today...
my cell pepz plus ESmond, EvelYn, Aaron...
Thank you for embarassing me so badly by singing the birthday song sooo loudly for me tht the whole world kept staring in our direction...
its a joy to be with you all.. :) love you all !!!

Thank you Hilda for e pretty flowers!! :)
they are lovely!! just like you!!
Thank you Genevieve for rmbing aft all these yrs...

to my dearest debra.. thx for the pretty gift!!
and cheryl lee n lam!! :)
so good to see ya again!!

to those who smsed me, msged me online n calling me...
i love you all..
i appreciate evry single one of u who rmbed....
it means a world to me... really...
it sooo made my day!!
xin, marcus, ting, weishan, bong, charlotte, bro's gf ange,
calvin, jay, cailin, pauline, geraldine, ervin, kaiyun,
leon, gen, nelissa, bernice, ET, mootz, jolene, jh, adeline,
kenneth, kang, shiang, jiayi, pinky! and many more down e list..
im so sorry if i forget to include..
be sure to lemme noe k..

THANK YOU EVERYONE!!

anw g2g now..slping time...
working tmr...
then party!!
Cheerios!
bye dude!
~tas

LOVE

oh.. juz rmb sth..
Emily is quiting her job..
or i mean she quit alrdy..
its a last minute decision...
thts soo sad...
she's like the nicest manager ard la..
alwasy giving me sound advice n stuff...
so sweet n all..
but she's gone.
its her last day today...

life is so unpredictable sths...
you never reali know wat happens next..
bittersweet memories are wat im taking with me..
trying to move on as life leads me..
its not easy really..
but im trying hard already..
smile is wat i say always..
but sths it doesnt go my way...
~tas

made a stupid silly mistake today tht cost me a few hundred dollars....
supposed to get some stuff printed ...
few thousand copies of it...
i made a dumb mistake of giving instructions to print on the wrong colour paper...
by e time i realise n called immediately..
it was too late..
im soo screwed la...
gotta pay it frm my own pocket..
sigh...how careless can i get...
an early present for a special day...

anw waited for dad to pick me up frm work..
waited for forever for him to come...
*sigh* when he came...
the traffic was bad..
had a minor accident..
bruised myself...
kinda sprained my leg too...

nothing is goin rite for me at all...
like all e bad events..
misfortunates tht came in a series...
all at once...
well.. when it strikes 12 i hope things will change..
at least for tht 24hrs...

goin for SMU openhse tmr..
with Xiu!! thank God she got well frm her lil fever today...
she got well enuff so tht she wont miss tmr!
n we're meeting angela for lunch too!! :)
so happy.... juz the thot of e two of them for company tmr is enuff to make me smile..
haha... im so easily contented, aint i? :)
btw.. angela said she's coming over ltr.. haha...
i've got company...
first few hrs of THE DAY!!!
i smiled.
~tas

juz.. me trying to be a lil poetic..
but i guess to no avail.. haha..
oh well..work was fine today..
nth much..less busy than usual..
got to go out n take a breather...
bought soo many things today..
not all totally for myself..
but for the ppl i kare abt and think abt...
bought stuff for the ones who have make a difference in my life...
i juz wanna to make them feel special..
n i wanna let them noe i love them so..
hope these lil gifts will put a smile to ur lil pretty faces!! :)
adios!
~tas

its a love-hate relationship...
to feel my heart beat..
fast and slow..
when the wind blow...
yet to be cooped up like this..
like something's amiss
trying so hard
to not let us part.
it wont be a shame...
cuz no one's to blame...
n u wont miss a thing.
if i'd end this with a sting.

if only fate played a bigger role..
and i'd really hope so..
or cupid wld have stayed a lil longer...
so love will last more than forever...
its all a dream.
as soft and fluff as cream..
yet i wished its true.
then i wont feel so blue..
now im hoping so much u'd stay ..
but u have alrdy gone away.

~tas

love is like the wind ..
you can feel it but u can see it ...
love is like sand ..
evrywhere but never dere ...
not for u
but me
~tas

spent my onli off day of the week applying for Uni admission...
but i tink im so lousy at it....
i kept having problems signing up...
its reali frustrating reali...
spent the whole day on e com..
trying to figure out wat is wrong exactly..
tried to slp..
but my air-con is horrendously lousy...
hafta get down to calling e service-guy to do sth abt it....
i cant live with lousy air-conditioning....
it gets on my nerves...!!

received another letter frm my china frenz today...
its e onli thing today tht made me sorta smile..
wld have been happier if not for my mum...
for being sooo unreasonable...
she said my clothes stink of cigarettes...
n she interrogate me...
asked me where i went i stuff..
i hate it when ppl smoke..
i hate not e person..
but the act of smoking..
but she actualli suspected me...
i was furious ..
so furious with her i screamed at her..
seriously...
of all the people she ask ME??
my brother smoke la..
i saw it with my own eyes..
i was super upset n utterly disappointed...
BUt she actualli asked me..
it goes to show how much she reali knows her daughter...
*sobz*
~tas

Geraldine is so sweet to me!!
though i always made so many mistakes she never took them to heart...
she actualli msged me to say tht i did a pretty good job..
i mean its like less than a week i've been workin for her..
being her personal secretary..
haha..it kinda made my day...
though there were many other lil things that totally made me smile...
went out for dinner with xiujuan...
dinner was fun!
had sushi tei .. ate till super full...
laughed so heartily too...
dint reali talk-talk..
onli more like talk la-bish e whole time..
it was like mutual entertainment..haha..
went window shoppin a lil..
felt tht i have enuff new tops for e time being..
so i wa trying to pick out stuff for xiu..
haha.. but apparently i dun have such pretty taste i realise..haha..
xiujuan was super sweet to me too..
making me feel quite bad...
she was showing me her buffed-nails...
which she used e new bodyshop buffer on..
which i thot was reali pretty n shiny..
i merely mentioned i wanna get it..
n she reali went down to get it for me...!!
she made funny excuses like she wanna buff her Toes!
haha... funny... sucha sweetie pie!!
though stinky n precious are definitely better representatives of tht name!!
haha... in any ways.. Thank You XIU!

anyways.. did i mention tht my lil brother actually bought a brand new PEARL Drum set..
gosh.. and guess wat...
its without my parents permission..
haha...super funny la..
he showed it to me e minute i reached home tht day..
then i asked him if "the two" know abt it..
he said no.. haha.. he said he wanted to wait till both of them are at home before he let out the "bomb"...
he said tht way he will wont get twice e scolding...
haha.. i burst out laughing la...
so comical..he knew he sure get a huge scolding...
yet he still purposely...

anw..gotta talk to Gen today..
haha..its been sucha long time..
i still rmb the times when Hilda Gen n me in primary school..
haha...n we're tinking of having a gathering....
its gonna be so much fun!!
aft soo many years...finally..
all my lost frenz.. now found again..
how i wish we'll go back to all those times..
n stay close frenz forever...
they're e ppl i treasure n care for ALOT..
i would really want our friendship to go back to wat it used to be..
though it wont be like wat it used to be..
i sure hope tht it'll be better than wat it used to be..
hopefully we'll stay frenz for a very long time to come..
thts wat i sincerely hope it'll be..
~tas

was busy at work the whole day today...
so many things to do..
made sooo many blunders...
felt so blur man..
seriously tired...
went to meet the girls out for dinner...
its been a long long time since we last went out for socials....
im soo glad tht we cld finally have socials ...
n im sooo happy so many ppl turned up..
stef ting charlene robyn jolene hueyying claudia caron tabi xinen...
im so happy to see them again....
its like the best attendance cell socials!!
being ard them make me feel so relaxed n joyful!!
they won the amazing race held by e church yest ...
n e prize was a sakae voucher..
so we had dinner there.. :)
jo n hy suppose to come down to escort me up..
but duno where they wander to..
i ended up dere even before they did...
n jo was whining again as usual..
so much for escorting me la... :(
then we head down to swensens for ice-cream..
to use the other voucher the circle-of-trust ppl gave us for xmas i tink..
not reali sure abt tht..
but anw..reali had a lot of fun with them...
i juz love these girls..
thoughi felt like a baby-sitter ..
hanging out with them is pure JOY!!
i miss them already....
came back.. with Robyn..
she's so sweet to offer me a lift back...
THANK YOU girl... love ya...
was nice talking to you..
will do more of tht in future yea..?
haha...

angela came over later tht evening..
naughtie girl sneaked out of e hse again..
haha.. came over to chomps for late nite supper...
haha..dropped by my place for awhile..
miss her man...
Thank you for droppin by...!
she's been always dere for me e past two years...
i miss those SA days when we sat ard talkin non-stop whereva we went.....
i miss those days...
i miss those times ...
i hope you are happy girl...
if ur readin tis..
rmb to come n visit me more often k...
n we muz have more of those dates k!!
i still owe u a treat n movies!!
haha...

watched a very nice show aft tht....
some tv drama show...
it was so touching...
man... its sooo sweet yet sad....
im like contradicting myself...
but its like bitter-sweet-sorrow...
duno la...

im looking fwd to dinner tmr with xiu....
which will make e end of another tiring day at work..
haha... :)
hope tmr will be less stressful...
work is piling up again...
i sure hope i have time to rest n catch up my beauty sleep...
i miss my bed...
time to slp now....
~tas

a love n hate relationship...
it happens to me all the time...
i hateh it sths...
yet a part of me feels so attached to it....
i duno wat im blabbering...
...again i go unnoticed...

anw..work was okay today...
had a new colleague..
gina..
she's nice..
i tink she looks like Alex though..
her facial expressions n all...
striking resemblance..
haha

cool...anw i sold abt 5 phones today..
taking into consideration i wasnt even keen on gettin commission ...
i did quite okay..
haha...

im beginning to feel very skeptical abt life...
its gettin more n more sad...
it feels weirdly sad..
the uncanny-dreary-lost in-my-own-world feeling...
tht i cant reali comprehend with words...
i suck..
maybe im tired...
its a downcast day...
n i cant tink alrdy...
~tas

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZHONG XING!!!

wenta NUS openhse today...
supposed to meet xiu dere..
but as usual.. haha...dear gal is always late..
met perry on e way..
it was reali fun talk in to him again like in a21..
talked abt lotsa stuff on e long journey dere....
the NUS talk was a waste of time seriously..
its super boring...
dint reali get much out of it...
well... nth interesting...
but the happy thing was tht i met ALOT of ppl dere...
n did i mention ALOT.....!
its like the whole world is there...
met perry vic nel ps mich lynn dan jolin cheryl connie yeli michelle hilda benji zhuo min ben josh dawn cheryl lam lee chrys jason olivia liting clarence tianhui jiamin ailian..... and the list goes on....
its like the gathering of old frenz all congregated at one point...
i believe if we stayed longer we'd have seen alot more ppl..
we wenta a cafe at NUS callewd munchie monkeys...
quite a cute name...
food's okay.. but the service is bad...
haha.. i even gotta see our dear vic gettin mad with e staff cuz they took so long to get the cheesecake...
haha.. oh well wenta town for awahile...
then scotts to grab a bite...
aft tht headed to church....
im so glad i went back all e way despite the journey..
i always feel a very comforting sense of warmth whenever im in church...
all my dear dear church frenz...
i love them...

finally gotta talk to him today...
its been a long long time...
havnt seen him in quite awhile too...
kinda enjoyed talking to him again...
it feels very much more comfortable compared to before...
i hope we'll be frenz for a very long time to come...
~tas

ahhhh.... im tired tired tired...
i wanna slack n stop working for awhile...
but i guess it'll be worse once i stop...
i need to occupy myself evryday all e time...
so i guess being busy n tired isnt so bad...
i realise i dint blog abt k-box with cheryl n Amelia..
plus xiu..who came super late.. n left me stranded in town..
luckily i found e other two... else i'll juz rot man...
anw it was fun! reali cool to hang out with them..
they are such nice ppl..
so nice to me...
we're having another session soon at cheryl's place nex weds...
hope it'll be good..
anw so sorry Hilda dint manage to get u to velvet undergrd tht day..
realised u actuali said u wanted to go dere....
but we went CBlack instead..
we're go another...
sometime soon okay...
thx so much for e chat...
reali got a load off my mind..
made me feel so much better to have someone to pour out my heart to...
not literally la...
guess sths its juz hard to find a friend....
someone to listen...
but i kinda sorted out my thoughts...
will tell u abt it when i next see ya... :)
~tas

i've been using too much of my brains..
its draining out all my energy...
i want a no-brainer job...
working at AA sapped up all my strength..
n its depleting v fast!
i need more drive in me to cont working...
sth tht is less mentally challenged...
at least then i'll be less stressed ...
n hopefully can then get to slp properly at nite..
today's work wasnt tht bad actuali..
gotta go out again..
it beats stayin in office e whole day i guess...
hopefully more away-frm-work assignments in time to come..
went shoppin again aft work...
its quite horrifying how i spend money nowadays..
spent hundred plus again..
bought quite a few new tops.. luckily it was on sale..
6 new tops in all...
most of it my fav colour!
black...!
haha... like wats new...
im in black like all the time.. evryday...
my wishlist is growing longer again...
sigh... cant wait to get my salary soon..
emily said she's gonna send down to my workplace..
hope its good :)
goin to Nus openhse tmr..
im still undecided abt where to go?
overseas?
NUS?
SMU?
NTU?
im confused....
i guess i'll juz go to all e openhse n look...
maybe i'll gain new insights abt wat i wanna do at which Uni..
but i guess with my kinda grades..
its hard evrywhere....
:(
~tas

im splurging again...
bought so many stuff today....
went shoppin n shoppin
spent almost 2 hundred dollars buying nonsense ...
almost a whole weeek's salary in juz a few hours...
i hate it when im in a bad mood...
cuz i go easy on money n regret aft tht...
im always like on either extremes...
i must tell myself tht SPLURGING is BAD!!
well but im glad i finally bought Burberry Brit fragrance..
the perfume Xiu introduced me...
i juz love it!
im pleased with myself for gettin tht! :)
it has tis alluring, sweet powdery scent..
very classy and chic...
makes one feel so swanky...
im falling in love with e scent all over again...
anw, work wasnt too bad today...
went over to run an errand..
cabbed evrywhere i go nowadays...
i reali shld revert back to taking the mrt or bus else my pay wont be able to recoup my "losses" on my expenses...
guess i juz want someone to love..
~tas

i need to leave e hse in approximately 3hrs to reach office for work....
i am so dead....
and my hair is still wet now...
juz came back..
took a shower....
im nice n clean....
but tmr will be torture for me...
shall gulp down loads of coffee to sustain e whole day today...
anw today's like e happiest and saddest day for me at e same time...
wont dwell further abt it cuz its pointless..
guess i juz hafta get on n move on...
whichever applicable..
guess im seriously not sound rite now..
my mind's swirling now...
cant tink properly..
its my most sober nite...
or shld i say morning...
wats e diff anw..
im in need of slp..
duno why im online oso...
guess i've been thinking too much..
cant be able to slp well these days...
no one to reali tell my stuff to either...
thank you Hilda for always being so patient with me..
listening to me rattle on n on...
guess thts e onli way i destress....
i guess im juz using it as an excuse to get things off my mind...
make myself feel a lil happier thts all...
:)
heard jamilia - superstar and Alicia keys - karma tonite!!
im so glad i did..
else i'd be soo disappointed...
wish they played Usher's let it burn oso..
anw.. im happy :) thts all tht matters..
i hope.
shldnt go on with sad entries...
delete.
deleted.
will blog more when im in a chirpier mood...
like i usually am...
its slpin time for now... :)
~tas