i open my eyes

i try to see but im blinded by e white light

i cant rmb how

i cant rmb why

im lying here tonight

and i cant std rmb e pain

and i cant make it go away..

now i cant rmb e pain..

how can tis happen to me..

i made my mistakes..

got no where to run..

the night goes on

im faded away

im sick of tis life..

i juz wanna scream..

how can tis happen to me...

~tas

i can understd wats e feeling inside me..
baffled by e way my thought control me..
changing my mood..
disorienting my emotions..
even i cant decipher myself..
its a big mystery to me..
heard tis song..
like e lyrics alot..

looking through those eyes..

look at the sky..

tell me wat do u see..

juz close ur eyes and describe it to me...

e heavens are sparkling with starlight tonight

thats wat i see thru ur eyes.

i see the heavens each time tht u smile..

i hear ur heartbeat juz go one more mile..

and suddenly i feel life is worthwhile..

here in the night i see e sun..

here in e dark are two hearts are one..

its outta our hands..

we cant stop wat begun..

love took me by surprise..

and there are some thing we dun hold..

sths are hearts are juz too cold..

so many things i rmb underneath the open sky with u forever

~wish theres someone i can spend my life with..
~tas

and i..
cant remember when was e last..
i walked out e door..
like i meant to..
was it sth tht i shoulda do..
i dunt like to hear im wrong when im right...
i dunt like to stare blankly at my fone wishin u wld call..
hopin somehow u'd appear before me...
juz like i want u to...

juz watched Coyote Ugly..
its reali nice watchin it again aft so long.. :)
like it main cuz the songs by leanne rimes are written n sung so well!!
~tas

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVRYONE!!!!! :)
~tas

been MIA-ing quite alot these days...
e onli place i can be found is in skool and home..
had reunion dinner two nites in a row..
sat n sunday..was glad i went..
cuz i havnt seen some of my cousins n uncle n aunt in so long..
had a nice time catching up..
but cldnt make it to MOS in e end..
SORRY ANGELINE DEBRA BONG !! :(
tink evryone will hate me for disappearing nowadays..
cant reali help it..
wish i can reali disappear..
disappear frm hall where all e productions full run n rehearsals are..
had rehearsal again yesterday...
it was dreadful!oso..

my eyes have been giving me problems..
e same old problems as last time..
tink i need to go back to Dr Wong soon...
mummy's been asking me not to drag it..
but.. oh wells...cant sleep cant study..
even open eyes oso hurt..
sigh sigh sigh...

gonna hafta go for management klass soon..
haha.. lcukily Ben's in my lect too..
but too bad different grp..
tink i better go now..
its gettin late..
hope it isnt another broing lect..
tata..
~tas

went shooppin at bugis with Debz yesterday..
went shoppin there with PQ last friday..
haha.. well well..
today n tmr got reunion dinner...
with mummy n daddy side...
hope it wont be so boring...
duno to dread it or wat...
sigh.. boring boring...
sunday got productions fulldress rehearsal..
all e hassle n all e work..

sighsighsigh..
eyes very painful for a few days alrdy..
duno wats wrong oso...
oh man..

met xin for dinner yesterday at chompchomp..
its been quite a long time since i last saw her..
she changed so much...
not like e person i know some time back...
lest e best friend i had in forever..
now like strangers alrdy...
felt kinda sad...
kinda missed e feeling of having a Best friend again..
guess it wont be anytime soon..
lost all e trust ..
tired-
~tas

HAPPY 19th !! :)
i've been e biggest slacker ard..
slp so lil slack so much study almost nth leh..
hELP! HELP!! HELPPPP!!!!!!
at tis rate im definitely gonna da-bao!!
*cries*

Btw HAppy Birthday JingLin!!! :)

~tas

im blogging now...
cuz xiu asked me to..
dun wanna disappoint her..
haha.. but oso duno wat to blog abt..
i actuali wanted to be a mugger once skool start..
but i've been out all e time..
too busy to be studying..
not much time in hall too...

had canvassing today..
fitness at work...
haha.. the person reminds me of yesha..
wonder how are they doing..
dint talk to them in a long long time..
oh well..

went outta skool with debz..
been leaving skool with her more often...
alrdy more than last sem..
haha.. goin bugis with her friday oso...
tis sat n sun goit reuinion dinner ..
mum's n dad's side too..
still got production full dress rehearsal..
tis time gotta put makeup and do hair for them...
oh man.. so so sian... nanny stuff...
last sunday's tech run was horribly boring..
luckily had some entertainers to add some laughter to our boring sunday...
toro was hilarious..

anw im setting up a stall for sea-ex canvassing..
it'll be on HSS family day...
will be selling quite alot of stuff..
hope it'l be a success!! :)

today's the IH cheerleading competition..
too bad out team didnt get any medal..
i thot they did quite well..
with SwAn as the mascot.. so cute!
tmr is sepak-tekraw.. finals..
hope they'll emerge victorious!!
:) Good luck guys!! :)

i've been skipping too many lectures lately..
mgt with humour is fun..
the prof is super funny...
cinematics is entertaining..
Mr knows-it-all and Mr Eyecandy keeps asking nonsensical qns..
and apparantly our super Gay prof loves students who are outspoken..
esp MR-s.. haha..

anw.. i hope i have more discipline in doing the stuff i need to do...
~tas

when u have no expectations.
most often you'll be more pleasantly surprised.

had production stuff today..
cant believe e coincidence of things..
the characters have changed names..
xiaojuan is now kexin..
wat a small world..
haha..
cant believe so many things have happened..
it seems like i've been sleeping too long..
n i've onli juz recently woke up frm a terribly long long dream...
its scary somehow..
watched e prodtn cast at work today..
e play is deep...
but it hits me somehow..
the feeling n emotions used are quite overwhelming for me...
i have no idea watso ever wat to do with my emotions..
i guess.. theres nth i can do..
depressed..
wondered to myself..
if i leave today.. right now..
will it matter at all to you..
wld it make a difference to you?

would u mind?
would u cry?
would u be sad?
would u miss me?
would you?
perhaps not.

i want to leave.
to somewhere far far far away..
wanna leave tis place.

~tas

thanks giving!
guess i reali need to thank e Lord for granting me wat i ask..
prayers do come true! :)
prayers work wonders..
believe in them! :)
~tas

this is xiujuan hijacking serena's blog, to say......

stinky is the cutest little dog ever!! :)

stayed home the past duno how long..
it rained n rained..
wonder when it'll stop..
hafta go back to hall tmr morning for tech run..
dun wanna go back..
spring began...
skool starts again...
perhaps its time..
anw i've decided to become a mugger frm day one..
start studying early so i wont always fluster at e last min..
duno if i shld take 5 or 6 modules tis sem..
i cant get e one i want yet..
hopefully someone will give it up to me..
hope tis sem will pass fast..
wake me up when its all over..
anw thanks david for e nice lil cheer me up..
and teaching me to learn ..
sweet :) appreciate it.. thanks!
u cheer up too yeah..
~tas

broken dreams

i walk a lonely road..

the onli one i ever know

duno where it goes..

but its onli me

and i walk alone

i walk tis empty street along the boulevard of broken dreams..

i walk alone i walk alone

my shadows onli one who walks beside me

my shallow hearts the onli things tht beating

sometimes i wish tht someone will find me.

~tas

love makes one feel so helpless..
unrelentlessly giving all u can..
sacrificing e heart wholeheartedly..
uncontrollably ...
chasing ..
waiting ..
even if it means to wait forever..

teach me to give up..
teach me to lose heart..
teach me to stop loving u..
teach me..

And if... tmr's not enuff for me to love u..
i'd spend a lifetime waiting..
if u love me too...
i'd cherish u forever..
i'd promise to
forever's not enuff for me to love u..
love hurts.
it hurt more then u ever know
the immense pain no one will ever know
why does e truth always hurt..
lies..
does it make me feel better?

someone to make me smile someone to lie on when im tired..
someone to say evrytink's okay when its not..
someone to be there for me when i need you...

crying out love in e centre of e world..

love me for a reason and let e reason be love
lose e dust cut e rules..
let it burn..
~tas

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to an angel in disguise
Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise
~tas

found tis pic.. quite nicely taken.. i will miss u girls... :(

us at balcony.. :) 

guess i havnt been goin public for a very long time..
well its e year 2006...
last year has been a good year..
enjoyed christmas n new year thoroughly..
spent xmas with ppl in church..
then to Javier's birthday party and family party..
then head to frenz place at Jo's and then to Pau's family gathering..
which was juz opp jo's place.. had soo much fun...
realised i love BOLS, lychee martini sooo much...
hahha it rawks !!

New year was spent in church at the costume party...
i was e makeup artiste for e day..
had so much fun literally drawing faces..
u have no idea how much fun tht is..
we had e Rockers theme for our cell grp..
man was it Rocking!! :)
we even won an award..
haha.. after which headed to Jo's place for e nite..
wanted alot to join my frenz out for e nite...
but apparently the fone network screwed up and i cldnt manage to contact anyone...
LaLa Angel n Bong they were in town.. momo i tink for countdown..
Xiu Pau were at Avriel's place.. which i have no idea where..
oh wells.. pretty much enjoyed myself so it was okay...
somehow managed to talk to some ppl i havnt spoken to in a long while...
so it was quite a good year...

Anws, skool started for me alrdy...
juz tht nw i refuse to stay in hall..
previously i was not allowed to by mum cuz i always fall sick there...
but things are different now..
shall not comment further..

had loads of fun yesterday at BAlcony...
with the BIMBs!!
Ann Angel Neo Shihui..
sadly Yingwen cant join us...
anws we had our usual Girl talk..
had so much fun..
but we sorta had to be shouting at e top of our voices..
cuz there was a reali rowdy crowd ard..
we cld hardly hear ourselves..
haha.. anw we discovered some nice drinks..
its e Jelly Cocktails... Balcony Island Punch..
was quite nice reali...
but kinda filling.. made me feel full..
fun fun.. juz tht it was open air.. the air con inside was so much better..
anws the restroom there was unisex..
so funny cuz a whole grp of girls walked rite in..
and there were guys inside..
headed home quite early tinkin i was out onli for like a few hrs..

Aww.. but Ann is leaving soon..
Lala left alrdy sadly...
awaiting their return nonetheless...

ZZouk Hall bash is tonight..
and i still duno if im goin anot...
sigh.. anws.. hope things go well..

goin to church later and to siglap to visit jo at her workplace...
it the guys second day in tekong..
hope all goes well for them :)
meeting PQ soon too...
movies chilling n doing nonsense like wat she said.. haha...
XIU... Pau.. where are u??
so busy u forgot ur felllow friend..??
meet up soon yeah.. :)
~tas

wat a day..wat a week..i did e most foolish thing ever...but The Lord was nice enuff to give me back wat i lost..the story of Lost and Found..hahah..guess i dun like hall anymore..after those incidents..somehow.. i dun feel like i belong..i actualli dun belong anywhere..duno why e lack of self esteem..guess its juz e time of e year..today Dengz Darryl & Shifu went in..enlistment today.. i wish them all e best!meeting angeline ann debra n shihui at the BALCONY later today...hope it'll be fun..cant wait!! :) haha..
~tas

 fierce n weird faces :) hehe..

nth seem to be working now..
skiped half my lecture was hoping to be able to log in to register my subjests..
but i cant even get in now...
studentlink is literally crawling..
fuming.. argh..
somehow things are juz not going my way..
well i guess things never go my way...
got the call yesterday..
for e first time it felt like things were okay..
but before i know it..
i realised i was wrong..
~tas

the MANAGERS! :)

 

XIU n ME

 

SMASH 2006!! :)

 

cell cluster event! :)

 

know wats it like to feel short??
ho meng is 197m tall !!

THE ROCKERS!!
haha.. so happy we won e award!! :)
God's HAHAs RAWK on!!

esta
me
dengzhi

 

..Leon. Duane. Darren. Kenneth..

 

 

XIU & ME .. 

 

LALA Angel & me..

Ann Zebra & me

xiu n me at MOS..

me with the superstar ALLY!! :)

mirrror shot.. :)

self shot.. :)